9-13-04 Journal

Main Page • John's Journal (2000-2003) • CLL Information • Contact John • Seattle Cancer Care Alliance • MD Anderson

I have commanded you, "Be strong and courageous! Don't tremble or be terrified, because the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9





"What happens to you is not nearly as important as how you react to it." Author Unknown



Four months ago I was fighting for my life in the University of Washington Hospital, trying to hang on as my heart rate soared to 270+ beats per minute from an allergic reaction to platelets. Now I am riding my bike twenty to thirty miles a day and my heart rate only goes up because I want it to. The Lord is so good!





I continue to be under the care of Dr. Blau at Rainier Oncology. I see her once a week. I really like her as my doctor. I feel very confident in her
care. She did much of her training up at the Fred Hutchison Cancer Center in Seattle and is very experienced working with transplant patients. My counts continue to be stable. I am still anemic (low hematocrit), which is a result of all the immunosuppression drugs I take for Graft Versus Host Disease. Fortunately my skin GVHD is being controlled quite well by my current medications. There are no signs of skin rash or redness. My fingernails have ridges on them as a result of the GVHD, but hopefully that will improve as well. Dr. Blau is going to attempt to reduce my MMF dose with the hope that the GVHD will still stay under control. I continue to take 50mg of Prednisone every other day. Most likely I will maintain the Prednisone dose until my next follow up visit at Seattle Cancer Care Alliance in December. All the medications I am taking continue to make me very susceptible to infection, thus requiring me to continue being careful about germs. Actually, I'll probably be extra cautious for the rest of my life. Completely different mindset once you are a transplant patient.




One of the treatments I will continue to undergo over the next year is a monthly infusion of Immunoglobin (IG), an important chemical needed by the immune system. The drawback to the infusion is that is takes about four or five hours. Fortunately, my most recent IG infusion was done with a friend and fellow transplant patient, Karen. Since we had to undergo the same IG infusion and started at the same time we decided to make it fun and race to see who could finish the infusion first. Despite my efforts to distract her nurse and hide items such as the thermometer, she finished her infusion first. I did not lose gracefully and am demanding a rematch. I am currently planning various strategies to ensure victory. You are going down Karen!!




Awesome surprise at clinic today! I ran into Dr. Ostensen, my oncologist since my diagnosis back in 1994. It was so good to see him. He has done so much for me. I literally owe him my life. Dr. Ostensen continues to undergo his own cancer treatment, and to quote him he says, "As an oncologist, I have learned that it is definitely better to give than to receive." I would have to agree with him on that one. He is a great man who has done so much for so many people, I will continue to pray for God to completely heal him and give him the gift of a long, healthy life.


I want to lift up the following prayer requests:

-Thanks for how far I have come and continued recovery of my strength and that my GVHD goes away so I can get off medications such as Prednisone, FK-507, and MMF. Pray the Graft Versus Leukemia effect is active and eliminating all of my leukemia cells.

-Prayer of thanksgiving for all the sick leave sharing I have received from my co-workers. The support is simply amazing. My family is so grateful.

-Gwyn's courageous battle against cancer. Pray specifically for the swelling in her legs and lower abdomen, clearing of the lungs, and for a miraculous healing of her cancer.

-Britt's brain cancer, his young daughter's newly diagnosed leukemia, and his brother-in-law, Tom's, liver disease. The family has such a heavy
burden on them and I ask the Lord to lift them up and carry them through this difficult time.

-Karen's continued recovery from her bone marrow transplant and strength to get through the complications she has endured along the way.

-Dr. Ostensen¹s complete healing from his cancer.


As I've mentioned before, I often feel God speak to me through Christian music. Lately, the song "Blink Of An Eye" by the group Mercy Me has spoken to my heart. Cancer has taught me many things, but one is how short our lives really are. Like the song says, our time here on earth is over in the "The Blink Of An Eye". I just pray I can make the best of the time I am given.



Blink Of An Eye
By Mercy Me


You put me here for a reason
You have a mission for me.
You know my name and you called it.
Long before I learned to breathe.


Sometimes I feel disappointed
By the way I spend my time.
How can I further your kingdom
When I am so wrapped up in mine.

Though I'm living the good life
Can my life be something great?
I have to answer the question
Before it's too late.

Chorus:
In the blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to you than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I will embrace very moment I am given
There is a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

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